Wednesday, January 09, 2008

accurate personalily test!

TRY THIS!

My Existing Situation:

Needs, and insists on having, a close and understanding relationship, or at least some method of satisfying a compulsion to feel identified.

My Stress Sources:

Has an unsatisfied need to ally himself with others whose standards are as high as his own, and to stand out from the herd. This desire for preeminence isolates him and inhibits his readiness to give himself freely. While he wants to surrender and let himself go, he regards this as a weakness which must be resisted. This self-restraint, he feels, will lift him above the rank and file and ensure recognition as a unique and distinctive personality.

My Restrained Characteristics:

Remains emotionally unattached even when involved in a close relationship.

Distressed by the obstacles with which he is faced and is no mood for any form of activity or for further demands on him. Needs peace and quiet, and the avoidance of anything which might distress him further.

My Actual Problem:

Needs to be valued and respected as an exceptional individual, in order to increase his self-esteem and his feeling of personal worth. Resists mediocrity and sets himself high standards.

COOOOOOOOOL. Everything seems extremely accurate except for that one line:"Remains emotionally unattached even when involved in a close relationship."
Hurhur, try it!

Posted by kevin. at 12:45 am

Sunday, January 06, 2008

ACKMED

THIS IS DAMN FUNNY LA.

Posted by kevin. at 3:17 am

Friday, December 28, 2007

lazy lazy lazy!

I've learnt that LAZY is spelt "K-E-V-I-N". You can simply see that from the frequency of my posts, by looking at my attendance for school and work and the number of hours i sleep and what i do when i'm bored(like instead of finding something productive to do like writing a song, reading a book, reading the papers or blogging, i choose to stare at the screen of my laptop hoping for some form of entertainment to just pop up, SIGH).

SO HERE I AM BLOGGING AGAIN! Hurhur. I'm damn happy that my school reopens in a week and then I have a mere 4-week semester before i finally graduate! And then it'll just be work till I get into what every guy dreams to be in - army. But ohwell, I kinda look forward to it for some strange and unknown reason.

Anyway, a friend of mine said this and I found it to be quite interesting and worth a thought. She claims that she'd rather not know than to know and be hurt and in other words, to be deluded or ignorant. Buddha's infamous quote: "What you don't know, you don't need to know" Wah it'll be damn power if i could live like that la. HAHA. But I really don't know which is better? You see, i definitely belong to the category of people who want to know every damn thing, even knowing every damn thing causes hurt. The very fact that you want to know more(and actually get to know more) means that there is a higher probability for you to get hurt. But is it really better to be deluded/ignorant so that you live life with the minimal knowledge of the things of this world and the things which affect you or simply, living life as simple as possible? I've always had a damn problem called "kevin's self-stressing syndrome" and I've always tried to curb that and even though it seems to be getting better, I really want to be MUCH-LESS-STRESSED and enjoy life as it is!

The following is a classic example of a case of Kevin's Self-Stressing Syndrome:

1am: Kevin lies down on his bed and TRIES to sleep.

130am: Kevin realizes he's hungry but that calling macdonalds would cost money and will take at least 45mins and that means he wouldn't get to sleep in the next hour when he needs to since he's gotta get up at 630am. And so, Kevin ignores his hunger and TRIES to sleep, again.

2am: Kevin gets pissed because just as he's falling asleep, his sister comes home and makes a hell lot of noise making supper.

230am: Kevin gets REALLY pissed because now he can't sleep and is very hungry and so he gets even more irritated because he doesn't know if he should force himself to sleep since he barely has 4hours of sleep left or if he should call macdonalds and get rid of the goddamn hunger once and for all and have only less than 3hours of sleep.

3am: Kevin opted for the sleep-and-ignore-hunger option at 230am but it obviously failed and so now he's REALLY PISSED and calls macdonalds.

3-4am: GRUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR.

4am: Eat and finally....SLEEP(after trying for the last 3 hours).

FUCKING CRAZY RIGHT? I KNOW!

Okay, I'm getting really groggy now and i think it's time for bed(don't worry, i'll ensure i have a full stomach before attempting the great feat of sleeping).

It's so fast that 2007 is coming to an end and it's gonna be 2008!

I'll do my goals and resolutions another day when my mind's more active.

MERRY BELATED CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!! : ))

Posted by kevin. at 12:28 am

Saturday, September 08, 2007

hello

OMG. I can't believe how lazy I've been. I was so excited and eager to post my response to a pretty interesting question my lecturer gave a couple of weeks back but I never found e time or energy to do it and now it's not so exciting anymore. :( but oh well, I shall just copy and paste it below since I'm already in blogger.

Question: "We will think and talk like the person we listen to the most"-Do you think this is true? Give examples.

Response: We are all the person we are because of those around us. We allow ourselves to be influenced and that can take place anywhere - at home, in school, at work, among our friends, among our loved ones, etc. Nothing much of who we are is actually "original" because almost everything that makes the person we are are learnt and caught during the course of our lives.

I would say that we are like "lego". We pick the different colours and shapes to build the very "lego structure" that the world recognizes us as. The way we talk and think can be moulded to the extent of which we allow it to. Therefore, the world works in such a way where everyone learns from everyone else but the underlying difference which marks us the unique way we are is our maturity, creativity and discipline. I sound like I'm holding a seminar but I think what I say makes sense!(haha). We are all creative and want to be that "somebody" we've always dreamt ourselves to be. Above that lies maturity where we are able to discern the best for ourselves and that includes the way we conduct our lives and what we want to achieve and what we want to do in life. Then comes the crucial factor that we all struggle with - discipline. Whether we can be who we've dreamt ourselves to be depends largely on this. I believe that who we allow ourselves to listen to most is nothing but a matter of choice and since we've made that choice to allow that individual to step into the innermost circle of our lives where he/she is tagged as the person we "listen to most", we have already subjected ourselves to be heavily influenced by that him or her in our thoughts and the way we speak.

A simple example would be to look at any group of friends out there in the streets and if they are a really close bunch, you would notice that their mannerisms, behaviour, speech and the things they enjoy doing would be very much alike, e.g. Either all or none will smoke.

END OF RESPONSE

YAY! Finally got my results and I can't wait to graduate! one last semester! WOOHOO. anw, very random but those who know what i'm talking about will probably understand. THE STANDARDS ARE DROPPING! HAHAHA.

*kevin thanks God, the Almighty that he was led to make e right choice*

Posted by kevin. at 2:33 am

Friday, August 10, 2007

ironic isn't it?

so now, 8months into the year and as always, invaluable lessons have been learnt, in the hardest way possible.

I truly believe in this - put any 2 people(preferably of e opposite sex) from any part of the world together(together as in in a form of a relationship, not just physically, duh.), and IF THEY WANT TO, it will work. Here comes the problem, the root of all problems which lead to the many broken relationships and marriages we witness - do both REALLY want it to work? so much so that they will compromise, sacrifice, tolerate, change, etc? Well, because I truly believe that if they can do all that, they WILL work.

Compatibility to me is bullshit. How many times have we heard this - "oh we just can't get along, we're so different!". Is that a good excuse to break up? Or rather, is that REALLY the PROBLEM? Well let's look at the other extreme - "oh man, i definitely don't want to date someone who's exactly like me, it'll be so boring!" My point is that no matter how similar or different you guys can be, you guys can make it work IF both of you want to.

Most arranged marriages have worked simply because both HAD to live with each other and in that, learnt how to love each other and get along even when they couldn't. Yes, that's an extreme example because in this age, we are given the liberty to choose our partners but my point is that using the "compatibility" issue as an excuse for a breakup is absolute trash to me because the truth is that you guys don't love each other enough to want it to work because there simply would be too many obstacles to tackle and changes to make. My take? - no such a thing as "we are not meant to be", it is rather "we don't want to be".

The most common reason for quarrels/arguments between partners is their differences. Be it differences in views, differences in the way they work, differences in the way they feel or differences in the way they think. And so the question remains, the one question which I've been trying very hard to answer - why quarrel when you can both have a constructive argument, debate or discussion? Why quarrel when it will cause so much stress, hurt, anger, disappointment and when it will tire both of you out? Why do it when you guys know you shouldn't?

Because you guys take each other for granted.

Notice that one will get angry more easily at her boyfriend/husband than at a colleague or a friend? Similarly, one will get hurt much faster and easier by his girlfriend/wife than by his buddy or boss. This is just the way it is. When we willingly commit ourselves to another person, we are opening up our hearts and minds to each other in a way where nobody else on planet earth can ever dream of experiencing. Isn't that the whole point of being "together"? You guys share a dream, share the love, share the joy, share the sorrow, share every possible thing/aspect/feeling that you can. I believe it takes a certain level of love in the relationship coupled with a certain degree of wanting the relationship to work for both to argue but yet love each other. But what I feel makes a mature person is when they choose to take the positive when it is seemingly easier to opt for the negative. Lost?

Example 1: It's Friday night and Jerome has made plans with Jean to meet for supper after his nightshift and was eagerly looking forward to it. The plan was to meet at 11pm but before that could materialize, Jerome received an sms from Jean that she's made a sudden change of mind and won't be meeting him because she feels it's better that she meets her mother who's spending the night alone.

Now Jerome has two obvious ways in which he can react:

1. "WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU PLAYING ME OUT? WOULDN'T I BE SPENDING THE NIGHT ALONE THEN? IS YOUR MOM MORE IMPORTANT THAN ME?"

2. "Darling, is everything okay? Your mom's alright ya?", and then talk things out in a mature, calm and loving manner.

Let's take this example but we'll do a switch in characters and instead of Jerome and Jane who are a couple, we'll have Shawn and David who are buddies.

My guess to David's reply to Shawn should Shawn play him out at such a last minute notice:

David: "What the fuck? Why couldn't you fucking tell me earlier so at least I wouldn't have to spend my friday night going home? You know how much I hate it as it's such a waste to my weekend"

Well, my point is that this shouldn't be the way to react to your partner because he/she surely means more than a homealone night right?

Or let's say David and Shawn are just mere friends who got to know one another recently, my bet would be that David would react in the most cordial way possible because he's not taking anything for granted and he definitely has no right to.

So why would you want to treat your partner more harshly and unlovingly than how mere friends or even acquaintances would treat each other?

Example 2: Sam had a rough day in school and everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. After that horrid day at school, he met Michelle, but with a really black and unpleasant face.

Michelle also has two obvious choices:

1. Put on a black face and say "If your face is so black, I'd rather you not meet me."

2. "Oh my dear, you don't look so good. Had a rough day? What happened darling?", and proceed to helping him make his day better.

Okay I know this is a really naggy and lengthy post but I just want to drive my point across.

We shouldn't react faster to anger than we should to patience. We should get upset without first being understanding. We should be more tolerant instead of throwing our tantrums so easily because we take each other for granted that he/she will have to stick it through with us even in our ugliest state.

The truth is that our partners are the dearest to us and therefore, have the ability to hurt us the most or to create our happiest moments. Don't be too quick to anger, to easily upset, too easily hurt, too easily disappointed, too intolerant, too impatient. They are afterall, the ones who mean most to you and I think the least we can do is to show them the best of us during the worst of them. That way, every problem is resolved in a quick, smart and loving way!

Every time we're given a choice, we can choose the positive or the negative. It might seem easier to go with the negative but it really never is. The ability to see beyond the present circumstance and into the future is one rare trait.

And in that few seconds of decision-making marks the great difference between one who is MATURE and one who just isn't.

Am I making sense?