Monday, April 23, 2007

religion?

I just realized that the statistics of my blog is quite scary. There are quite a lot of visitors and even a number of regulars and I'm so sorry that you're going to read about me and my personal argument about e existence of a "god".

The thoughts linger and resurface every time I'm put in a situation where I really wonder if this loving, sacrificial and righteous God exists. It's just way too convenient to give glory to God for every good thing which happens and blame e devil for every bad. When you fail, someone will be there to tell you that it is alright because what cannot kill you will only make you stronger. When an unfortunate and uncontrollable event occurs, e.g. the Tsunami, they say that God is in control of things, He is sovereign and He has reasons and thoughts above ours so even when such a tragedy happens, be sure to trust in Him because it only happened as He allowed it to and He'll definitely have His reasons for it. But I highly doubt the families of these tens of thousands who died will be so willing to accept that "truth" about God. What they would say is that if a god exists and if this god is good and loving, how could he possibly allow so many thousands of innocent lives to be lost just by a sweep of currents initiated by what they so call, a "devil". It's just too easy to give all glory to God for the good things and blame everything else on e devil.

What about stories in the Old Testament of the Bible when God killed thousands, plagued a country and cursed nations?

When I fail in a business venture, I'd be told not to give up but to try again and start afresh because everything happens for a reason and if I don't call it quits this time, I'll come back stronger because God is always w me and w Him, all things are possible. That sounds really encouraging but I think that those theories do apply to non-Christians as well. It IS true that what fails to kill you will cause you to become stronger and that you should never give up on yr dreams in life. And I truly believe that even a non-Christian who doesn't have a "god" on his side can still succeed on his subsequent attempts. On the contrary, that Christian might try the second time and STILL FAIL and he'll be fed w e same counsel yet again and try the third. How then, does the principles and miracles of "god" apply?

Everything in the Bible is encouraging, educational, motivational and positive and can be read by any man in the world. If that man takes heed and accepts those principles and teachings found in that book, he'll be encouraged, educated, motivated and be a more optimistic person without even being a Christian, attending a Christian organization or having any relationship w a fellow Christian.

The truth's that there's no concrete proof to the Christian beliefs because if there is, anyone who devotes himself/herself to any other religion or even atheists(who happen to top the lists in the richest/most successful people in the world) would be clearly deemed as absurd.

Okay and having said all that, I promise to do my best to update something less argumentative/borderline antagonistic in future. Maybe I'll start blogging about e events in my everyday life like what I ate for my 3 meals, how school was, what I did and where I went throughout e day and what time I slept. HAHA.

Posted by kevin. at 11:04 am

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Marjoe Gortner Exposes Fake Preachers

this sounds and looks familiar...HAHAHA

Posted by kevin. at 5:50 pm

Sunday, April 08, 2007

god?

is there really a god out there?
and no, i'm not going atheist here but here's my take.
I do think that there's a god out there but my doubts lie in the very thing Christians believe firmly in - the bible.

is everything in the bible true? is there no exaggeration at all and could it all come down to e power and wonders of the human mind?

I'd say that most Christians around the globe believe in healing and that god is here to provide it. Of course there are prerequisites to you attaining it and of which, the most common of all would probably be faith. some may argue that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. is that really faith or could it be just luck? you'd say that faith is not needed when god can be identified with by the 5 human senses and that it is precisely because it doesn't work this way that we need faith. well then, how would you know that this "faith" you're believing in or that you have might not just be a play in your mind? what do i mean by that?

Most of the Christians out there would have experienced a first-hand account of a miracle healing in a crusade or a church service or at the least, seen it or heard of it somewhere. Personally, i've seen over a hundred of different cases of healing. Big, small, jaw-dropping, heart-moving, you get e idea. But what we don't know is whether that IS healing or just a play of the mind. Researchers say that the average human uses only a mere 10% of his potential brain capacity. Knowing that, I'd not dare imagine what it would be like to be using a complete 100% of the mind. But let's not go into that. What i'm trying to say is that the messages you receive, the words from the preacher's mouth, the experiences you've heard of might just be enough to stimulate that mind to work a little harder into achieving the usage of more potential brain capacity. Seeing a lame man stand up from his wheelchair to walk might be a mind-blowing sight because it goes beyond what the mind calls "logical" into the seemingly "impossible/supernatural". But is this really healing or is it the work of the mind after it's been stimulated into believing that "standing up from the wheelchair to walk" IS possible. What i've NEVER seen is the medical EVIDENCE to show that the patient has RECOVERED but what i've always heard is what they always want us to hear and that it takes FAITH to SUSTAIN the healing. What about cancer patients who've been "healed" but die a couple of weeks later? I don't think we actually will ever get to hear of them. and e truth is, we'll never know.

Well, there's actually a little personal experience of mine about the power of the mind.
I've ever been made a "steelrod" simply by having my mind stimulated by a motivational speaker. What happened was that there were 2 chairs approximately 1metre or so apart. On one chair lay my head and the other had my legs on it. The rest of my body was supported by the many hands of the students beside me. My eyes were closed. The speaker began to speak words like "strength is going through your body and you will soon be as solid as a steelrod" and constantly reminded me to keep my eyes closed. Before long, I felt a slight weight upon my stomach which lasted about 30 seconds. Soon after that, I felt another weight, this time heavier, on my stomach again and it also lasted about half a minute. And then i was told to open my eyes. I looked up to see the eyes of my fellow schoolmates wide open and the shock on their faces. I was told that the students stopped supporting my back but my body laid straight like a "steelrod" with just my head and legs on the chairs. And after more words spoken to me by the man, i had him sitting on my stomach WITHOUT SUPPORT BELOW MY BACK. The final shock came when a classmate of mine (weighing about 60KG) stood on my stomach and in all of that, my body didn't move a single inch. That to me, IS the power the mind possesses when it is stimulated.

Could this all be the work of our powerful mind that is largely stimulated by our belief in the phenomenon of a god?

Everything we believe as a "miracle" or "work of God" could very well just be luck or a play of our minds. Have you ever experienced or encountered a miracle which is objectively tangible?

Having shared my views on this, I do hope that none of you get offended and you have my apologies if you are. This is my take on this topic and I'd very much like to hear yours. :)

Posted by kevin. at 3:00 am

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Debbie : "I need you to be stronger than me, to be there when i'm hurt"

Kevin : "You bet i will :)"

Posted by kevin. at 12:39 am

Sunday, April 01, 2007

memoirs of a trolley-ed foot.

SIGH.

it was 430pm. after putting on e pink tie and re-checking my uniform to ensure neatness, i strolled out of e toilet to e office for e usual clock-in.

as i walked on e beautifully carpeted floor of e world's number one airport, i reached into my pocket for my cellphone to text Debbie. so there i was taking e longest time ever to reach e office so i could type that sms and before i could react, i found myself lying on e floor. my immediate thought - "shit, i fell. so fucking paiseh! quickly get up!" i turned back to see an indian delivery man who was pushing his over-stacked trolley filled w cartons of mineral water hurrying up to me and saying "sorry sorry brother". i got pissed and retorted, "relax la brother. are you fucking blind or what?" and that's when i realized that my shoe came off and it was completely bent and that made things worse cuz they were 2weeks old! i realized e trolley trapped my trailing foot and i don't wanna imagine e damage it inflicted when i bent it so i could take a step forward. nevermind that, i decided to get up so i could disappear from that embarrassing moment. but that was to no avail. i realized i couldn't move my foot anymore and they felt both numb and painful at e same time. i exclaimed after i tried to move it and e indian man told me "slowly slowly brother" while giving me a hand". by then, e security were already looking over and telling me not to move but to wait for a wheelchair and employees from e shops around obviously kaypoh-ed since this was a sight out of their ordinary and often boring routine. and so i waited, and waited, and waited, and decided that since i couldn't move my leg, i could still use my hands. so i canceled e draft of that sms and decided to call her instead. she picked up, heard what happened and told me that she'd request for urgent leave so she could rush down from work. i was relieved to say e least.

e wheelchair came, i got carried up onto it and we went on a journey to the Raffles Medical Centre. it didn't help that i had 2 not-very-experienced security members who had to ask e Information Counter for directions to e clinic! SIGH.

so i reached e clinic and had nothing positive done to my poor foot except for e precious, much-encouraging words from e doctor who said that it's either a fracture or a torn tendon or ligament. YAY. this part of my life, i call "HAPPYNESS". HAHA. ANYWAYYYY, i got some cream applied on it before taking e referral letter to Tan Tock Seng Hospital for an x-ray and not to mention, PAYMENT FOR THE STUPID TREATMENT. (i don't wanna reveal e amount but you can try giving it a smart guess since it's RAFFLES MEDICAL CENTRE. SIGH).

okokokok. i think i'm damn draggy and wordy so let's do this fast. so debbie came and we took a cab to TTSH. upon arrival, i just had to be asked stupid questions by nurses and often told to "please take a seat" before i finally took 2 x-ray shots. PLEASE TAKE A SEAT. like THANK YOU SO MUCH but i'm already on a goddamn wheelchair?! - ___________ -

results of e x-ray showed that there was a black line on one sheet which they suspect might be a hairline fracture of a bloodclot because of e torn tissue. and they cannot confirm it but instead, sent it to e bone specialist because e subsequent xray shot from a different angle didn't have that black line. so they cast up my leg, taught me how to use crutches and told me to come back for a checkup on wednesday.

so here's presenting a NEEDY, HOPPING, SAD, ANGRY and BROKEN Kevin. HAHA.

how very scary it is to know that accidents happen at split seconds that you might only come to realize you've been involved in one AFTER it actually happens. SCARY. to think i didn't even react before i fell and thought i could still stand up (that's why i screamed at that idiot) kind of makes it funny.
and e most important revelation i had - my life took a TURN just because of a careless trolley pusher who decided to take e lazy way out by stacking so many cartons till he couldn't see past them. now i'm just hoping my bosses can find out e necessary information from e security since 4 of them were present and i'll be able to claim insurance for e bleedy medical bills.

so thank you darling for rushing down to e airport, for staying w me cuz you didn't want me to be alone though that almost caused you to miss yr Phantom Of The Opera show, for accompanying me home after e show, for spending e whole saturday lazing at my home because there's nothing much we can do w a limping boyfriend, for e positivity and faith you have in us (i know this may seem random to e public. my apologies. HAHA), for your motherly care and concern and for your LOVE!

it would have been so different if you weren't around. you made it much easier to go through and i'm absolutely grateful for YOU!

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!

DISCLAIMER: IF YOU HAVE YOUR GOOSEBUMPS UP BECAUSE OF THE MUSH IN THIS WRITE-UP, I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR.
(yes, i know this disclaimer should be placed at e top). HAHAHA.

ohhh and moral of e story?

If you want to be lazy and enjoy being served, go break yr foot.